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NARR: On Friday nights, at the corner of fifty second street and ninth avenue, a fleet of private buses pick up passengers heading to upstate prisons . The buses take families to visit their loved ones. For the last five years, Adrienne Smalls has watched these buses come and go. Over the years she has become a counsellor to the women on the bus. An hour before they arrive, she starts laying out her wares.
FADE UP: SOUND OF ADRIENNE SELLING HER STUFF.
NARR: Adrienne sells everything from Tylenol to baby wipes. It's the kind of stuff that you usually buy at any drugstore, except it all conforms to strict prison regulations - everything is shrink wrapped,
sealed and nothing contains no alcohol. Many of the women who buy her goods are bringing them to their
husbands - some have been locked up for more than a decade. Smalls says even after years of watching these women, she doesn't understand how they keep making the trip.
TAPE: THEY ARE COSTLY. THEY ARE TIME CONSUMING. THESE TRIPS LAST
ANYWHERE BETWEEN 18 AND 24 HOURS. THE SUPPORT THAT THESE WOMEN GIVE TO
THE MEN I HAVE NEVER UNDERSTOOD. THERE ARE A LOT OF WOMEN ON THESE
BUSES WHO GO UP WEEKEND AFTER WEEKEND.
NARR: Adrienne and the prison wives have a name for those who have been riding the buses for a long time. They call them Prisoners of Love. At 9:55 pm the first bus shows up.
FADE UP: SOUND OF BUS COMING . ADRIENNE CALLING OUT TO THE WOMEN IN THE BUS.
NARR: On its way to the prisons, the bus makes its final stop in Manhattan at a deli.
Most women board the bus from the outer boroughs directly after work. It's their last chance to get some food before the bus heads upstate.
FADE UP: LATIFAH ASKING FOR MACARONI AND CHEESE AND CHICKEN PIECES.
NARR: Latifah, who preferred not to give her last name is one of the women ordering dinner tonight. Her husband, Kareem, was convicted of a robbery and sentenced to fifteen years to life in the Collins correctional facility, seven hours away from the city. Kareem has been in prison for ten years now. Latifah says she used to make the long journey every weekend to see her husband. . Now, she visits only once a month. She says she beleives her husband is innocent and its her love and patience keeps her in the relationship.
TAPE: IT'S BASICALLY NOT HIS FAULT. ITS MY CHOICE. IF I CHOOSE TO DO
SOMETHING EITHER I AM GOING TO STICK WITH IT OR NOT. IF HE COMES HOME
AND MESSES UP I AM NOT GOING TO DO IT AGAIN.
NARR: Latifah's commitment to the relationship is not very common. A research by the Aleph Institute, a not-for-profit organization that works for prison reform and family welfare, says the divorce rate among couples where one spouse is incarcerated for more than one year is 85 percent. Despite this high rate, there are many women who make the trips. The trips are draining not only physically but also financially. Round trip bus fares cost between 55 and 75 dollars. All expenses included the cost of a visit can run up to $200. That's on top of the telephone bills. Because prisoners can only call collect, telephone bills can be overwhelming. Adreena Holmes's husband has been in prison for three years for an assault convicton. She says her telephone bills are between 500 and 1000 dollars a month. Adreena had trouble paying her mortgage because of her bills. Yet she says that even if her husband had been put away for life, she would continue being married to him.
TAPE: YOU WAS HAPPY WITH YOUR MAN BEFORE HE'S GONE AND NOW THAT'S HE
GONE YOU DON'T CHANGE. I HAVE FAITH THAT WHEN HE COMES HOME HE WILL
PICK UP WHERE I CONTINUE TO DO IT AND EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY.
NARR: Holmes travels eight hours twice a month to visit her husband. She says the visits are important to keep the relationship alive.
TAPE: THE PHONE CALLS, THE LETTERS AND THE VISITS KEEP US REAL.
THAT'S HOW WE KEEP TOGETHER. THAT'S HOW WE COMMUNICATE. AND ON A
VISIT THAT'S WHERE YOU GET YOUR PERSONAL CONTACT. YOU CAN'T REALLY
EXPRESS YOURSELF ON THE PHONE THE WAY YOU CAN SITTING FACE TO FACE.
NARR: Even if that face to face visit time is just eight hours, the prison wives beleive that they are bound by the vows that they made in their relationship. For women like Latifah, that means a very literal interpretation of the marriage vows.
TAPE: BETTER OR WORSE MEANS THATS WHAT IT IS. THIS IS THE WORST.
IT'S GOT TO GET BETTER. ITS NO DIFFERENT IF HE WAS HOME AND HE WAS
SICK. I LOOK AT IT THAT WAY. IF HE WAS HOME AND HE WAS SICK I WOULD
HAVE TO TAKE ON THE BURDEN FINANCIALLY AND I LOOK AT IT THAT WAY.
NARR: Evette, Latifah and Holmes, may never admit it, even to
themselves but there is something deeper than love that keeps them
going..... But Adrienne Smalls, who has had several family members in prison says it's the control that the women can exercise over their man is what makes these relationships
addictive.
TAPE: Adrienne Smalls: I THINK WHAT WE WANT TO BELEIVE IS THAT THE
MEN WILL COME HOME AND DO THE RIGHT THING, EVEN THOUGH WE KNOW IN THE
HEARTS OF HEARTS THEY MAKE A LOT OF FALSE PROMISES. AND EVEN THOUGH WE
KNOW THEY ARE GOING TO FAIL.. WE WANT TO BE ABLE TO MOLD THEM, CONTROL
THEM. IF YOU SEND THEM A LETTER YOU CAN MAKE OR BREAK THEIR DAY
DEPENDING ON WHAT IT SAYS. IF YOU ARE NOT THERE AT THE TIME THEY CALL
YOU CAN MAKE OR BREAK THEIR DAY. . ITS ALL ABOUT ATTITUDE.
NARR: The exhilaration of the convenience and the freedom that the prison wives find in the relationship does not always keep faithful. Lynn Jennings lives in a small quiet one-storey house in
Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. Lynn's husband of eleven, Fredrick, was convicted of murder and sentenced to 25 years to life in prison. He's served 37 years so far. Lynn says she has few financial needs and she says she's chosen to stay married because it is convenient to have a man—but not really have him around. Lynn's
focus is on studying to get a paralegal's certificate.
TAPE: My goal right now is not a man. I don't know how I can say this
without being real grimy. Right now, my education is my penis, okay?
And I don't want a relationship here with anyone.
NARR: Every afternoon, Lynn looks forward to getting her mail. She says it's the high point of her day.
Lynn doesn't have a car and at more than two hundred fifty pounds, the mail is her only contact with the outside world. Lynn is the penpal to many prisoners, including her husband. Between eight to ten
prisoners write to her on any given day and she writes back. As with most couples who have a spouse in prison, letters are THE sexual link.
TAPE: You write sexual letters and you get very explicit in the
letters. You give him your fantasies. You tell him, 'yes baby, I got
off to you,' 'yes baby, I was thinking about you,' and you put
specifically everything you felt with him in the trailer with that
man.
FADE UP: ADRIENNE WRAPPING UP HER STUFF.
NARR: Back at 52nd Street and 9th avenue, it's 4.30 am and the last bus to upstate prisons has left. Adrienne Smalls is packing up her goods. She says she'll be out next weekend to not just sell her deodrants but also to lend a ear to the women on the bus. Smalls feels the prison wives stay in these relationships because after a point it becomes a cause of them, a way for them to feel that they are accomplishing something by just standing by their
man. Sadly, though Adrienne says the relationships last anywhere between six weeks to six months once the man comes home.
TAPE: I have not seen in the six years that I have been out here not one woman has come back and said we are still together past six months. Doesn't exist. They only use the woman as a package, as a phonecall, as a visit, something to stay in contact with the outside world. Maybe to bring their child up. After they came home that person was just a convenience at that time and they move on to the next person.
NARR: Staying married to an man in a prison
Priya Ganapati, Columbia Radio News